I find it surprising how the smallest thing can lead to my unease and guilt now.
Today much of my life is led to please my Master, his happiness with me is very important, and that is a good thing.
But sometimes…..we won’t touch on how many times…..I fail. Most of these failures are reasonably small, and I know he understands that I fail not for lack of effort, but for circumstances beyond my control.
Recently I failed at something that actually stayed with me and disappointed me. I was sad, down, distraught even….and that surprised me.
It was the kind of failure that logically should not be important, but somehow, I knew it would be for him, and I wanted to cry.
How is it a tough chick like me has become so wrapped up in her Master’s pleasure that the smallest thing brings pain to her heart?
ttyl…..beth
From A Cocoon 