Archive | May 2011

Laying in wait…..a novelette…..part 3

She sat at an outside table at the cafe slowly sipping her coffee.  She went through the newspaper slowly, same old news until one article caught her eye.

Another woman attacked, blocks from here!  As she read the details she realized it was around the same time she’d returned from home the previous night.  A shiver went through her as she wondered how close she came to being in the wrong place at the wrong time.

She jumped as a deep voice filled her ear “Shame isn’t it?  A woman can’t even walk alone at night now”

She looked up, shielding her eyes from the sun to see a vaguely familiar face.

“Sorry if I startled you, I’m Josh” he said as he held out his hand.

She was a little leery as she shook his hand, unable to place his face, “Stacey” she replied.

He smiled as he sensed her nervousness, and he waited to see if she would ask.  She did not.

“Anyway, nice to meet you, I’m off to do my shopping.  Probably see you again sometime” and off he went.

She finished her breakfast, left the paper behind for the next patron and went to do her own shopping.

Her spirits started to lift as she went from stall to stall and friendly banter was exchanged with the owners and staff; they were used to her Saturday morning visits.

He knew her routine so he did not have to follow her, instead he went ahead and smiled at her as a few times she ended up next to him at a counter.

Finally as she neared to end of the market he was there; “Hey, are you following me Stacey?” he joked.

As she laughed she realized this is why he must seem familiar, she had probably seen him around the market before.

He looked down at all her bags “Can I give you a hand?  Do you live close?”

“No, it’s alright, I’m not far.  Do you live close?”

“Yes, just a few blocks away.” he replied

She stood feeling a bit awkward, “Well I’m off home then, nice to have met you”

“And you Stacy, have a great weekend” he said

He stood watching her walk away, thinking that tonight he would dream of her at his feet.


Saturday evening was warm and clear.

After she finished dinner she took a glass of wine and sat on the balcony, enjoying the quiet, unaware of him in the shadows.

His eyes took in her body.  Her long legs were bare, her shorts rode up as she rested her feet on the banister.  He imagined he could smell her heat.

He watched her sip her wine, her tongue flicking out to lick a stray drop from the edge of the glass.  He could almost feel the softness of that tongue against his skin.

He wanted to walk by casually, perhaps strike up a conversation, but he felt it was best to wait.  He wanted her off guard, he wanted her to invite him into her home.  Once invited in she would be his.

So he watched, and planned the things he would do with her….



Max Shares….

Max, my bgf, her Dom, and I meet  in a hotel for some Afternoon Delight.

The door was opened by my bgf and her Dom….”We did not order room service” he said

“No, but someone ordered water” and he laughed…”yes, good idea…water is useful in these situations”

We went in and we all tried to find our spot.  Not a physical spot to sit but more a mental and social place to be comfortable and to fit in.  I had already been with my bgf (as you know if you’ve been following along) and with her Dom but Max did not know them.  He had met my bgf for a quick hello and a drink but not more than that.  But to me Max had been all encompassing.  This, I’m sure, was a great consideration and concern to my bgf and her Dom as we’d all established a bond.
So we all chatted and got comfy.  Oh and add to this my lack of experience with 4 somes compared to theirs.
It was not long before Max gave into his natural desires and bent me over the bed….he pulled up my skirt and started to play.
My bgf and her Dom moved to a leather comfy chair and he had her disrobe….as Max played, licked and loved my ass I admired her pretty red Corset….”You look lovely in red” I said
Max moved me around to face them, still on all fours, so he could play with me and I could watch them.
As she faced me, on her knees on the chair, her Dom behind her, playing….we smiled at each other as we moaned.  She leaned over to kiss me and Max grabbed my hair

“Did you ask?  Did I give you permission to kiss her?”

I groaned as a thrill passed through me, and I hung my head a bit “No, may I kiss her?”

“No”  he said as he pulled my head away by my hair

I whimpered and gasped as he pushed his fingers into me.  I heard her moaning as her Dom manipulated her….from under my hair I watched her face.

I heard Max drop his pants, heard the belt and waited.  He wrapped it around my thigh, pulling my lip into it and stretching it….then he did the same thing on the other side.

He lay the belt across my back and left it there.  I felt his finger inside of me…2….2 more…stretching….felt him opening me.  I groaned, moaned….tossed my head….listened to the moans from my bgf and shivered.

He pushed deeper, stretched me wider….and I glanced at my bgf….saw her looking behind me and turned my head.  I was shocked as I realized there was a wall length mirror behind me.  I groaned “I did not realize there was a mirror”….my bgf laughed, “didn’t you?”

I looked behind me I saw what they saw….my ass….my pussy…all open and spread….

Finally Max allowed me to kiss my bgf….our lips touched…our tongues danced….groaning against each others mouths as fingers continued to push their way into us.

Max removed his fingers and picked up the crop, I jumped as he started to slap my ass, thighs and pussy.  I found myself arching more, opening wider….wanting to feel the sting.  I heard small yelps from my bgf and looked up to see her Dom was slapping her ass….between her thighs….her eyes were closed as she moaned.

Max found an angle, a spot, that had me panting….torn between wanting to scream stop and never wanting it to stop.

My bgf started moaning louder, I lifted my head and watched her….I could not see what her Dom was doing but whatever it was, it was working!  Her moans filled the room as her face was awash with pleasure, I watched her cumming, hearing myself moan, sharing in this with her.

Max pushed me closer to her, allowing me to suck and nibble at her nipple….adding to both our sensations.

Then he had me stand and bent me over, leaning my arms on the chair, while her Dom had her turn over.  As she looked up at me we waited….and were told to kiss, which we did with great pleasure, once again caressing tongues.

Max pulled my head away by my hair and I was left to watch the expressions pass over her face as her Dom pulled out some clips and attached them to her nipples.

Max pushed my legs further apart and spread some lube over my ass….getting out his ribbed glass dildo and slowly inserting it into me.  When it was pushed inside of me he reached over and started to pinch my nipples, pulling at them, squeezing them.

They both encouraged my bgf to lick and suck my nipples….she sucked one, he painfully pinched the other.  I shuddered at the contradicting sensations….moaning as he pushed the dildo in another notch.

I watched her Dom with the riding crop between her thighs and saw her arch in pleasure.

As Max continued to pinch my nipples, harder…pulling till I yelped….the oiled dildo started to slip from my ass.  He pushed it back in…”Are you pushing it out?” he asked

“No” I groaned back “it must be the oil”

He grabbed my head roughly by my hair “Are you making excuses?”

I groaned as he pulled my head back….”no” I whimpered

He moved close against my side, he pulled my head close to him and he wrapped his hand around my throat.  While he pinched my nipple he pressed his hand against my throat…I moaned and breathed against him.  He exerted more pressure, pinched harder, I was dizzy with the pain, head swimming from his strength, lost in the pleasure.

When he let me go I grabbed the chair for support, my legs shaking, my lungs breathing deeply.

I opened my eyes and watched my bgf writhing on the chair in the throes of another orgasm, her Dom’s fingers buried deep inside her, her legs open wide, her back arched.

As we both came down the men started to move us around again…me back on the bed on all fours, ass to the mirror and her on her knees on the chair, her legs open, her arms resting on the back of the chair.  Facing each other, close enough to kiss when allowed.

Max started to squeeze and slap my pussy, I jumped with each slap, never sure where it was going to land.  I watched her face as her dom played with her….she bit her lip, she groaned, sometimes letting out a little yelp.

Her Dom spoke to me….”Guess what I’m doing”

Knowing no answer was really required I waited….”I’ve got 4 fingers up her ass and look how she’s enjoying it”

I saw her eyes go wide “4” she mouthed incredulously and moaned again as he pushed.

My pussy was burning, my lover was all over, driving me crazy.  I could only hear the moans of my bgf as my lover pushed my head down into the bed and thrust his fingers in and out of me.  I throbbed and shuddered, moaned and pulled at the covers.

He pulled me back up by my hair and whispered into my ear “Are you enjoying, MY sex toy?”

“Yes” I groaned out

Her Dom piped up…”Did you thank him for using you so well?”

Max yanked my hair, waiting…”Thank you” I whispered

He yanked again “For?”

I groaned out “For using me”

“Good girl” he said and he kissed me deeply.

What a fun afternoon 🙂  I like it when Max shares his sex toy 🙂


Laying In Wait….a novelette….Part 2

Another long week was over, and as she came out of the subway and turned towards home she decided to treat herself to dinner out.

She changed directions and walked to the neighborhood pizzeria.  She joked with the waitress as she settled at her table.  The restaurant bustled with an end of the week crowd but she chose a spot away from the noise, where she could read and unwind.


He waited in the darkness, listening for her steps.  She was very late and he grew frustrated.  He was on the verge of going to her home, thinking it was impossible he had missed her but perhaps she’d stayed home today, but then he heard her.

Her steps were slower but they were hers.  He waited and as she passed him he noticed something was different.  Her walk, her sway….she looked drunk!

He felt himself fill with anger as he pictured her in a bar; drinking, laughing and flirting with others.

He kept a tight rein on his anger and he followed her.  Her shoulders were slumped, her step not filled with strength and confidence….he could take her now.

But something held him back.

He retreated into the shadows as she arrived home and slowly climbed the stairs.

He saw her light go on, and he waited.

Tonight she came to the window and held back the curtain as she stared out.

As she stood there the light flicked off, her silhouette was all that showed.

He watched her drop the curtain and sit.  He watched her stare out the window, he could see only her outline as her head bent and her shoulders shook.

He felt a pang and thought “This one will be worth keeping”

He felt himself grow hard and with a last look he moved away to search….for a fresh anonymous victim….



Meanings And Symbols

Yesterday I went snorkeling for about 4 hours and I had a wonderful time.  But before snorkeling you are always advised to “remove the bling” as fish such as Barracuda’s like to take nips out of shiny objects.

So I removed all my jewelry and off I went to explore.

I had a wonderful time, saw some beautiful fish (including some Barracudas) and found some shells.

It also helped me to overcome a fear I have of what is in the ocean with me when I swim.  I love going to the beach but I tend to just dip to cool off as usually I am alone, or with non-swimmers and I have (had) that small fear.

But after yesterday I am much more confident about the fish that are among me, and how little they care that I am there.  Now I can swim away, fearless!

Another interesting thing happened.  As I was swimming alone, after the snorkeling was done, I started thinking of the “bling” I’d had to remove.

I wear a stainless steel bracelet and anklet.  Both represent to me who I am and what I feel.

Removing them for an extended period of time is difficult.

These symbols mean nothing to anyone else, but to me I am reminded of how I feel and of where I am in my journey.

The snug feel of the cuff around my ankle reminds me of the pleasure I feel when submitting to and serving the right person.

The constant weight of the linked bracelet catches my eye constantly and fills me with a sense of strength at having decided to explore those desires, rather than hide from them.

Meanings and symbols….do you have, my readers, have any you would like to share?


When lives intersect….anything can happen.

Thanks to the internet we now meet many people we never would have 20 years ago.  People always used to say things like “we were meant to meet” or that “things happen for a reason” but what about now?  Do the same ideas apply?

Over the last 18 months, as I’ve been getting to know “strangers” online I’ve met some really great people.  I’ve met some assholes & bitches too, but the internet is not to blame for that!

I consider myself lucky to have kept a few of these contacts, they are friends and confidants and I value all the knowledge we share, as well as any time we get together.

Unfortunately there is one that has come to a sad conclusion.

A man whom I watched go from a wonderfully kind, gentle and caring man to a man who lost everything, was very depressed, obsessed and frankly at the end of his rope has apparently ended his life.

Due to some errors in judgement his life was systematically destroyed over the last year.  There were times in the process that I think a right turn instead of a left would have made a big difference for him but it was not my choice to make; all I could do was give my thoughts and advise.

As I grew closer to another man, he became obsessed with my relationship with this man.  He questioned every aspect of it, and while I understood he was trying to make sure I was making informed choices, I started to get frustrated when none of my answers satisfied him.  He kept asking the same questions, merely changing the words.

In between this he would also insert very depressive comments. often referring to how he would end it soon.

I finally had to stop communicating with him and this made me feel very bad, but I was at a loss as to what to do.   When I tried to be cheery, that didn’t help; when I tried to be logical, that didn’t help; his obsession just seemed to grow and he became angry and mean sometimes.  I felt I was not helping him, that I was more a hindrance to any chance at recovery he had.

I received an email over the weekend from someone claiming to “not be him” and giving information that he’d been in an accident and that the prognosis did not look good.  It was also implied that the accident had perhaps not been an accident, and that “we”, his friends on that list, had failed him.

It’s taken me a few days to process this, to decide how I feel and I knew I had to share it with all of you.

I feel bad and at a loss to know what I could have done differently.  The sad fact is his life went off the rails partially because of my relationship with him, but also because of the choices he made.

If we had never met, would he be here today?  Would he be living his same old life?  Or would he have found another way to destroy the life he had?

In his last email to me he stated he regretted meeting me, and that hurt.  I never regretted meeting him, however I also try to make it a policy to not have regrets, I feel they are just wasted energy.  And of course, it was not my life that was being derailed.

Raw honesty; I am slightly suspicious that the email is not legit; does that make me a cold person or a realistic one?

I wish I did not bear the responsibility of wondering what I could have, or should have done differently.

Will I miss him?  No, but I will miss him in the world.  He is/was a good, kind and sweet soul.

I still feel kind of numb and disbelieving that a life can go from 60 – 0 in such a short space of time, he really did nothing to deserve being ruined.

Through all that he went through he kept saying he felt it best to be honest, and look where it got him.

I am sad, I am numb, I am disbelieving, and a little in shock I guess.


Comparing D/s lifestyle to vanilla lifestyle

Tonight I had a lovely evening out, dinner with friends on the 30th floor of an ocean front building.  The ocean was blue, the waves were relatively calm and the breeze was lovely.

The conversation was interesting, the food marvelous, and the wine enjoyable.

On my way home, as I reflected on the evening, with my vanilla friends, I wondered about such an evening with D/s lifestyle friends.

An evening were everyone is open about their desires, no one is hiding or ashamed, but the evening is still “just” dinner, conversation & wine.

As I went over the evening in my mind I realized that as much as I enjoyed myself Iwas still guarded.  The people I was with were friends, but not people I would trust with my care.  I still maintained control and awareness, looking out for myself.

That lead me to wonder how relaxed I would be if I were at the same type of evening with a D/s crowd, with D/s friends and I realized that there are only 3 people I trust to care for me, to watch out for me in such an event.  Only 3 people that I would be relaxed enough to “watch my back” haha.

I think I am glad to have those 3 people, but I also think I am sad that I trust so few.  Or maybe that I am so mistrusting?


It Started With A Threat….Turned Over :)

He released my ankles and wrists, he let me walk around a bit, get some water, and freshen up while he waited patiently.

I returned to the bedroom to see him waiting.

“Ready?” he asked.

With a nervous smile I got back onto the bed, this time on my back.

He repeated the same basic position, legs and arms spread, ankles and wrists attached tightly and then he held up my new clover nipple clamps.

I held my breath while he attached the first one.  My eyes opened wide at the pain, it was more than I expected.  He attached the other and watched me breath fast, trying to settle into the pain.

He watched my face as he pulled onto the chain, up and down, tugging it, smiling at my gasps.

Leaving the clips for the moment he moved between my legs.  He pushed a butt plug into my ass and flicked on the wand, I strained against the restraints as he pushed it against my clit.

I groaned as he teased me with it, pushing it hard against me, pulling it slightly away.

He lifted the hood of my clit and applied it directly, listening to me howl.

Like a kid he played, pushing, pulling, sometimes taking the wand away and pinching my clit between his fingers.

As my body adjusted, and my moans grew quieter he started to pull on the chain attached to the clips.

I arched and yelled.  The pain shot though my whole body, I tossed my head side to side….the clips, the wand…..moving around and around.

My voice felt strained as I could not seem to stop moaning.  My body was stiff as I tried to lift to ease the pull on my nipples.

I heard him chuckle “I can do this all night.”

I nearly sobbed as I realized he would not stop.  I grit my teeth, determined not to give in.

He may have noticed my determination as he shifted position and knelt beside my waist, and began to pull the chain from side to side, not giving me a chance to get used to the grip.

Shivers seemed to go through my body, first one side, then the other.  The grip of the clips shooting sensations down each side as he shifted them.

I was pulling at the restraints, I wanted to spread my legs wider, I needed to feel that wand more……I strained against it, my body was tight, my mind was loose.

And still he kept going, I felt myself waning, he pulled the chain higher, I yelped and screamed……my safe word spilling over and over from my lips.

He held the chain high for a moment, watching me and finally he let go.

He turned off the wand as I lay shuddering.  He put his face near mine and with his hand on one of the clams he whispered “This is going to hurt.”

I screamed as he released the clip and I felt dizzy.  I did not even notice his hand move to the other clip until the pain shot through me.

He released my bonds and sat back on the bed.

I rolled onto my tummy and curled up next to him.

We talked…….